Saturday was great! Really great! During Friday night dinner, Eric and I had mentioned our plans to check out the Rainbow City and found Steve and Kristine also had the same plans in mind. We decided to join forces to have a fun Miami excursion together. I can’t tell you enough, how great Saturday went: Everything was great. Saturday night came along and I was a bit tired, but still content. I went to bed late, feeling very very tired, upset, and weak, only to wake up an hour later running to the bathroom not sure whether I should sit or lean over the toilet. It wasn’t pretty– in fact it was downright awful and disgusting. Marlowe woke up. She was hungry, crying, with a soiled diaper, and I was dying. I was able to feed her, change her, lay her back down, and run back to my worst nightmare. My phone has been broken for almost a week now and I was unable to call anyone for help. Hell, even if I did have a phone to call someone, what could anyone do for me? Nothing– There was nothing to stop my bathroom visits and I was miserable. I lay my head against the wall with a sleeping baby next to me and a confused Jerry staring at me. I started hearing noises and Jerry started growling. I was nervous– it was now 4:30 in the morning. I peeped my head to look out the window and there was Eric and Veronica on my back deck. That night Eric has left his car at my house, but his keys were left inside my house while he was down the street at a friend’s. He was locked out– and lucky I was awake, and I was relieved to see him. Eric asked if I needed anything, but there was nothing he could do. He laid down and went to sleep and I spent the rest of the night with intervals of dozing off to sleep followed by abruptly waking up to run to the bathroom. Visits to the bathroom have been my worst nightmare since giving birth to Marlowe and this was no exception. We can leave all the sitting details out of this…. but by morning I had run to the bathroom 7 times solely to lean over the toilet to rediscover my lunch and dinner. It didn’t stop– I didn’t understand– there was nothing left in me to give, why didn’t it stop?! I’m incredibly stubborn when it comes to being sick, going to the doctor, or hospital, but I could feel the dehydration really kicking in and I knew I would have no choice, but to go. There was no way I would be able to produce enough milk if I couldn’t keep down any food or fluids. I used Eric’s phone and called my family (specifically my step mom) and asked if they could take me to the hospital while Eric stayed with Marlowe. (I was incredibly lucky– I haven’t pumped milk for weeks and 3 days prior to this nightmare I decided I would try to store some milk *just in case* and I had managed to freeze about a bottle an a half.) I was at the hospital for hours. Any medication they could give me was not breast-feeding safe which is unfortunate while I am still doing everything possible to avoid giving Marlowe formula. I refused medication, took the fluids, and was sent home. Marlowe has an incredibly difficult time taking a bottle, I knew Eric would struggle with this. I know Marlowe cried– a lot, but in the end, she got fed and was very well taken care of. I came home, showered, and slept for hours. I was awake for about 3 hours that day, only to: feed Marlowe, have a small bowl of soup, and spend 2 hours watching a movie with Eric. As my stomach started feeling better, my fever got worse and continued to rise throughout the day and slowly fall during the night. I woke up in the morning with that recovery feeling… I don’t know if anyone knows what I’m talking about, but I remember getting sick when I was younger and having a certain strange feeling the day my fever would finally go away.
I feel better today. Much better. I still have no phone— and my car has been at Steve and Kristine’s since Saturday, but today is looking up– and best of all: little Marlowe never got sick. I was so worried about her, but people kept reassuring me that breast-fed babies are the healthiest humans around and all my antibodies would protect her– and they did. I am so happy to be able to snuggle with my little one again. This past week it has really been hitting me how fast little ones grow. They really do change in a blink of an eye. When I was pregnant I wanted her to come out and be ready to play, run, and talk, but now I would give anything to keep her small as long as possible. It was so incredibly hard to be away from her at the hospital and then be asleep and not able to hold her the whole rest of the day. When I woke up the next morning I had felt like she had already grown a little bit in that day I was away. I mean, she has already doubled since birth– every second really does matter. I want to always keep her close and keep toilet nightmares very, VERY far away.

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I have a million pictures to upload from the better portion of my Saturday. But for now I am going to lay back down with my slowly waking baby and relax. 

3 Comments

  1. oh i so feel your pain! i dealt with something like that a few weeks ago for 24 hours straight and was miserable. everyone in my office has had it! (i live in NE florida so maybe it's just going around the state =[) glad you're better!

  2. sucky! i hope you are doing better, getting sick while you have a new baby is the worst.