How are you friends? I’m good. I think. Maybe a bit more anxious than I’d like to admit. But things are good. I don’t know, I guess I’m trying to figure out a groove where I’m accomplishing all the things I need to accomplish, but still really finding time to do the things I want to do.
…but I think that’s just the definition of “life” isn’t it?
I think if I were to quickly judge I’d say I’ve been able to do that– you know, do the jobs at hand and enjoy myself. But then judging by my slight sense of urgency I’ve had today, maybe not? Or maybe not today at least. Ebb and flow.
I’ve been working on juggling blog/content jobs, homeschooling Marlowe, taking her to extra curricular activities, keeping her a live and well (haha), renovating our own home, searching for an apartment (and the stress of being denied offers), creating new projects, trying to keep connections in a relationship going, and managing my tricky health. It’s not a lot. It’s life.
But I have from time to time also been able to sit in the sunshine, go to the gym, plan and prepare for travel, see friends and family, and get some craft time in.
So I’m doing it all.
Marlowe and I leave for Mexico Friday. I’m very, very excited. It’ll be good to get away from it all here for a bit. Marlowe will be learning Spanish and I will spend my time between work and beach time. I still haven’t booked my return flight home– and I don’t really want to. (But I will.)
Also stressful because if we don’t find a place before then, it might put off the whole thing even longer. Or if an offer goes through, then it leaves Alex to manage the not fun, but must do details of buying a home.
I talked about all this apartment stuff and the financial aspect of it in my newsletter last week– but if you guys don’t know what I’m talking about. We’re hoping to buy an apartment this month. We’ll move our personal lives into it and rent out our home to guests again. Alex couldn’t get into the idea of downsizing into an RV (fair) so this is our compromise to a living in a smaller home, with the hope of renting out our main house. We are looking forward to finding a place soon so we can rent out our home sooner than later. I’m definitely the type that once I jump into a project, I’m go go go full speed ahead. I don’t like to stall. So now that we’ve set on this, every day that passes feels like a lesson in patience.
Had we planned it better, we would have been in a place now and had our home available for peak season in March. But that’s not how the plan worked out this year. On one hand, I’m very excited to make this shift (go go go!). On the other hand, the financial investment of it all is stressing me out. It’s going to drain out my savings for sure.
But I’m hoping this investment takes me one step closer to complete financial freedom sooner than later. I’m not sure if I feel sad about leaving our home or not. Some days yes. We’ve worked so hard on it! But some days I’m just ready for the shift. I’m aware that our home is beautiful– it’s cozy, bright and welcoming, and while we’ve worked hard, I’m ready for other people to enjoy it too.
In my mind, our apartment design will be much more minimalistic. But as my design brain flows, I become skeptical that it will stay minimalistic, haha.
Now, while we find an apartment, the plan is to begin to prep our house for guests. Any extra repairs that need to be done, will be done. And soon we will go room by room deciding what stays at home and what stays with us. I. just reminded myself that I was going to make a list for Alex to pack up, while M and I are away, heh. Our personal photographs and belongings will be packed up to come with us, of course. But there are other things that are up in the air.
I wonder where Alex and I will butt heads with this. I’m happy parting with my material goods. But I know he’s already set on bringing his records. His cookbooks? I’m not sure. I hope he leaves them for guests, but I wouldn’t be surprised if they came too. I told him he has full control of the kitchen. As long as my vitamix comes with me, I’m set, haha.
I’m pretty happy with how life turned out for me. I grew up wanting to be an exterior designer. And while I’m obviously not, this path I’ve taken gives me the opportunity to play one sometimes.
I really love design. I really like making a house a home. And now, I’m doing that with two separate spaces.
Marlowe is the funny one in the situation. Like this gem stone wall-paper. I’m OBSESSED with it. I got it about 6-7 years ago and held on to it for this long. I thought for sure that she would want it in her room– to match her collection of crystals. But no. She has requested white walls and all the furniture she already has, she wants with her. And so the wall paper became the bathroom of my dreams wall paper. Which is fine, it made for a beautiful bathroom, but I thought for sure she’d want this amazingness in her own space.
But I of course will not fight her on this. It’s her space. And her things. And she’s been completely fine with the idea of the transition– excitedly looking at each apartment with us. Some she has loved, other’s she turned down. And I definitely do not want to make it a bad experience for her. So if she wants her current furniture, then she keeps her furniture and a new space will be created.
Why she doesn’t want to choose colors for her wall or fun new furniture for her space is beyond my understanding– as I dream of doing that and begged my parents to paint my walls ALL THE TIME. But I mean, I get it. It’s who she is. She finds comfort in her normal space. So we’re just moving her space with us.
But yeah, life is good. A bit hectic most days (I can’t tell you how many appointments I accidentally missed in the last three weeks) and financially nerve-wracking, but it’s good. This isn’t the plan I would really choose right now. But this is the plan of compromise– one that I can look at as a step into designing the life I do want.
Just like our home and planting trees (our front door bougainvillea arch did not grow overnight), good things take time.