Ask anyone who knows me and they’ll tell you that I am in fact the most indecisive person in the world. I’d much rather let the universe decide my path than ever have to make an actual decision. I’m happy to let my path magically unfold as it may… no matter how smooth or turbulent it might be. So whenever I have any sort of choice or have to make any sort of decision, I do not take it lightly. Something like a “simple purchase” for one person is a major internal (and often external– dragging all my friends and family in too) debate for me. #minimalistproblems
Some of you guys who have been here for a while might remember I had a tricycle, long long ago. It was mostly part of my other life… the drunker life I had pre-baby, where I’d ride my tricycle through the streets of south beach with the dog and a bottle of wine smoothly propped into my rear basket. An ex-boyfriend gave me that trike. While he was not wonderful, it was probably one of the top ten gifts I ever received. I used that trike through my party stage and into motherhood… well, a little bit into motherhood anyway. But no matter how I fastened the kids’ bike seat, Marlowe hated riding on the bike. HATED IT. After a few attempts, I gave up and my bike ride moments became limited to the few moments I had a babysitter where I could escape for a short ride with friends.
That bike fell apart long ago. It was already secondhand when I received it and didn’t last too long being stored outside in the humid and wet South Florida weather. But it served me well in the time I had it. I’ve now been without a bike for about 6 or 7 years or so. And I’ve had some sort of debate, on and off, about it this entire time.
The thing is… (and maybe you guys know this, but) I never learned how to ride a bike. I was never taught and I never learned. I’m not really ashamed and I don’t feel that bad about it. It’s just a fact. And so for years, since that trike gave out on me, I’ve been in a debate: *Do I take the time and effort to learn how to ride a real, two-wheel bike? Or do I buy another trike? Or do I forgo both options and stick to my favorite form of transportation: my feet?*
For the last few months, the debate has weighed on me even more. Especially with our new more central location. I knew some sort of wheeled transportation made sense– especially with Marlowe and Alex enjoying rides so much. But which form? Two wheels? Or three? The logical answer seems like two. I’m in my mid-thirties and trying to grow and advance in all areas of my life… something as simple as two wheels should be something I can accomplish.
I sort of almost attempted a two-wheel once— Marlowe’s bike, in the garage of our building. Within a few minutes, I felt uncomfortable and decided to take a break (maybe an indefinite one since I never got back on). To be honest, part of me feels like at some point I *should* learn how to ride a real bike. But the reality is, I’m also quite comfortable with the fact that I do not know how and I may never know how to do it. Should I feel like a failure? I’m not sure, but I don’t.
I went to the used bike store multiple times. I told myself maybe I’d just buy the two-wheel beast and force myself to learn. But that option also felt like a really big risk. And so each time I would visit the bike store I would look at tricycles too… *just in case* but I was bummed each visit, finding a serious shortage in adult trikes.
I mean, if you’re local, then you probably know why– we have adults on them quite frequently around here. My old red trike came into my hands long before this trend picked up amongst the elderly. But now, those stable, balance struggling-friendly trikes have become much harder to come by. This made my decision to get a trike even harder. I’ve been pretty adamant about buying second hand as much as we can. And bikes have been no exception (Marlowe and Alex’s bikes are both secondhand). So to give in and buy a new bike for me felt wrong.
To make my whole decision game even harder, I had made another rule for myself that I didn’t want to make ANY purchases that would not fit in our future downsized life. I’ve been pretty good about this. (Maybe even great.) And a tricycle… and or even a bicycle certainly could not fit into our future downsized life.
Yet at some point, a decision was made. I never made a solid verbal affirmation about my decision, but I think Alex could just sense that I was finally comfortable in a decision to buy another trike. Not to mention, both he and Marlowe were eager to make this whole family bike ride thing happen. And so, an order for a new (not secondhand), three (not two) wheel bike was completed.
Part of me feels like I could feel defeated in all of this. At 34 years old I haven’t made it to two wheels. I didn’t buy this item second-hand, and this is a bigger purchase that certainly doesn’t fit into the future I’m designing for myself. (I swear I don’t plan to make one more purchase that doesn’t fit. THIS IS IT). BUT despite these things, if I’m being completely honest, I feel okay about all of it. It feels really good to use a car less, to use my legs more, to bask in sunshine while commuting, and to have a really big (dorky) basket that stores all our things when we go out on family bike rides. And you can be sure that I’m going to take good care of this thing in the time that it’s in my life. <3 Maybe I'm just a giant dork for all of this. For the giant three wheels... and for the big debate on something so extremely trivial... I don't know. But I feel pretty happy too. I may not be able to balance well on two wheels, but I'm figuring out a balance in the other parts of my life which is cool too 😉 THIS is the trike we ordered btw. And yes, it took me a hot minute to make up my mind on what type and model I should even order. And if you never rode a trike, let me tell you: damn it’s a workout! Those things are HEAVY! <3